your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Randomize
