His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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