I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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