is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
