I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
