where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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