Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I just forgot I was standing up.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Randomize
