i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
