Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Nicole vs. Life
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
