mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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