I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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