does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
