Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
