I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Randomize
