STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize