Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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