she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
