I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
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