We won't sleep together?
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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