well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
