Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
