and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
