I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
