I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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