Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
