you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
We need to rekindle our bromance
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
