Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
