Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
