She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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