so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
