Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
it's like heaven, but drunker
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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