Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
