I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
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