Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
