We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Randomize
