I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
