Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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