her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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