The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
