is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
