I'm going to jail i love you
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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