do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Randomize
