i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I feel great
I just peed on a car
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
