so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
