tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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