Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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