it hurts more in the daytime
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
