Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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