Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
