You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
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