You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
